


🍃〰Love with fear〰🍃

by Ampharos_yellow



Category: Pocket Monsters | Pokemon (Anime), Pocket Monsters | Pokemon - All Media Types
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-14
Updated: 2020-12-23
Packaged: 2021-03-11 04:34:38
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,130
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28059264
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ampharos_yellow/pseuds/Ampharos_yellow
Summary: Some people are afraid of losing someone they love because they do not have reciprocal feelings feeling guilty for ruining it, others are afraid of falling in love and blame themselves if they do, each has their reasons, but uniting two people each with a different fear is ... interesting
Relationships: Gou | Goh & Satoshi | Ash Ketchum, Gou | Goh/Satoshi | Ash Ketchum
Kudos: 16





	1. 🍁 ~ Ruin it ~ 🍁

**Author's Note:**

> 1-This was written before the Eevee episode  
> 2-My original language is Spanish but I adapted it to English  
>   
> 3-It won't be that long 3-4 parts  
> 4-It could be considered as an OoC  
> 5-Enjoy your reading

T-I love you -said the blue-eyed and then pounced on the lips of the jet in a kiss that felt for the eternal but was suddenly cut off-

S-satoshi? -He saw him scared while the other held him by the shoulders with a nervous face-

Gou and-I ... I'm sorry !! - He pushed the brunette slightly to get him off him and run away, slamming the door-

-The brunette simply climbed onto his bed while the tears and thoughts induced him but he only knew one thing - .. I have ruined it .. - he whispered into the air now full of sadness-

🍁〰🌼〰🍁

-That memory was going through Gou's mind all the time in this last week, the atmosphere became so tense that he only saw Satoshi when they crossed by accident, to eat or in his room but still they did not speak-

-The energy was so uncomfortable that Professor Sakuragi had not sent them on any mission due to the poor performance that this could have ... he really did not blame him, he blamed himself, the aurrino How difficult is it to keep those things for the same and pretend that everything is fine? It seems a lot to him-

-Umm? -He said raising his head observing that he had arrived at Sakuragi Park, apparently he was so immersed in his thoughts that he started walking in any direction-

-He stayed there watching the pokemon play in such a happy environment, he decided to go inside to clear his mind for a moment-

-Many of the pokemon that passed greeted him or others were so distracted playing that they simply continued on their way, he loved being there, it was a good decision to stay since apparently he only needs a little positive energy to improve his mood for the moment-

-I spent the rest of the day there since I did not want to return to the laboratory but it was already night and the cold began to become more noticeable so she had to go.  
As he walked he saw the little Nidoran couple go by at first he wanted to ignore him but seeing Heracross and Pinsir together made it impossible to ignore the pain in their act-maybe not all of them can be loved- he thought before recalling the "event. "and stay still-

-Mime mime !! - The blue-eyed man was startled by the sudden interruption but when he observed Mr. Mime he calmed down-

-I'm sorry, I didn't see you arrive. What's wrong? - I ask the pokemon which responded with mimicry indicating that dinner was ready-

-Gou followed the pokemon to the dining room where Koharu was sitting while drinking yamper tea, with Cinderace eating berries-

-I thought you wouldn't come -said the girl while taking a sip of tea-

-Sorry, I was watching pokemon -she took a seat while the psychic pokemon served some curry and handed it to her-

-umm ... it really doesn't surprise me much -he said with a slight laugh-

Haha-giggled the brunette-K-koharu, haven't you seen S-satoshi? -He asked nervous-

What do you mean? -Asked surprised the danger-I guess he's finished dinner and left - she answered, being the most obvious conclusion I reached-

-The girl looked at him surprised-Mmm he went to Pallet Town for two days, I thought he had told you-

What? No ... He didn't say anything to me -he said with a little pain in his chest- How strange he said that he had done it- and then look at his sad friend-eh! Maybe I just forget it - I exclaim trying to make the brunette feel better -

No, I don't think so-an uncomfortable silence enveloped them but in this one felt the sadness of one of the individuals-I-I don't know ... he could ... maybe just ... I'm sorry ... agh! -the girl tried to say while mentally hitting herself for making her friend feel bad-

-Don't blame yourself, after all I ruined it -he said looking at the girl who looked worried -You know .... I'm not really hungry- he got up from the table to leave -Thank you Mr. Mime for the food - he thanked while carrying the little sobble and leaving there -

Gou ...- he watched his friend leave full of sadness-Cinderace, do you know what happens? -He asked the fire-type pokemon which shrugged -... When that fool returns they can give him up for dead ...- he expressed anger as he saw his reflection in his tea-

🍁〰🌼〰🍁

-Tears flowed uncontrollably from his eyes while the initials of water and fire tried to carmar him uselessly since the brunette wanted to find Arceus and stop everything and stop driving away the people he wanted, he remembered when everything was better when he did not think that Satoshi I hated him and could speak contemptuously without fear of losing him when he still felt nothing outside of admiration or friendship-

-The night continued with sobs full of pain, the salted tears wet the pillow leaving him so weak and fragile while he thought about what could have happened if he did not say anything, but what was the use? He already confessed he cannot erase the past and if he could, his feelings would make him make that mistake again ..... The best thing was to disappear, flee so that other people can be happy and fulfill their dreams without being a obstacle for them ... for him-

🍁〰🌼〰🍁

Koharu pov

-After dinner my father took me home, although all the way I thought it was happening to Gou-

-I was analyzing the situation and came to a small conclusion..love..Gou had fallen in love with Satoshi, now that I think about it it was a bit obvious it is just remembering most of the interactions between them-

-But observing the situation Gou would have reached a point where he could not hide his feelings and would have told him ... then he rejected it ... Very good Satoshi, I'm going to kill you-

-I lay down next to Yamper and although I think I have a part of the problem there must be more but now that will be enough for me to try to really help Gou, although I can act cold next to him and other people I don't want to see him sad I have known him since I was a child and this can affect you a lot, I just hope I can help you-

(Versión en español)

T-te amo-dijo el ojiazul para luego abalanzarse sobre los labios del azabache en un beso que se sintió para el eterno pero fue cortado repentinamente-

S-satoshi?-lo vio asustado mientras el otro lo sostenía por los hombros con una cara nerviosa-

Gou y-yo...Lo siento!!-empujo levemente al moreno para sacarselo de encima y huir cerrando de golpe la puerta-

-El moreno simplemente subió a su cama mientras las lágrimas y pensamientos lo indudaban pero solo sabia una cosa -..lo he arruinado.. - susurro al aire ahora lleno de tristesa- 

🍁〰🌼〰🍁

-Ese recuerdo pasaba por la mente de Gou todo el tiempo en esta última semana,el ambiente se volvió tenso tanto que solo veía a Satoshi cuando se cruzaban por accidente,para comer o en su habitación pero aun así no hablaban-

-La energía era tan incómoda que el profesor Sakuragi no los había enviado a ninguna misión por el bajo rendimiento que esta podría tener...realmente no lo culpaba el se culpaba a el mismo,lo aurrino ¿Que tan difícil es guardarse esas cosas para el mismo y fingir que todo esta bien? Al parecer mucho para el-

-Umm?-Dijo alzando la cabeza observando que había llegado al parque Sakuragi,al parecer estaba tan sumergido en sus pensamientos que empezó a caminar hacia cualquier dirección-

-Se quedó hay observando a los pokemon jugar en un ambiente tan feliz,decidió adentrarse para poder despejar su mente por un momento-

-Muchos de los pokemon que pasaban lo saludaban o otros estaban tan distraídos jugando que simplemente seguían su camino, le encantaba estar hay fue una buena decisión quedarse ya que al parecer sólo necesita un poco de energía positiva para mejorar su ánimo por el momento-

-Paso el resto del día hay ya que no quería volver al laboratorio pero ya era noche y el frío empezó a hacerse más notable así que debía irse.  
Mientras caminaba vio pasar a la pequeña pareja de Nidoran al principio quiso ignorarlo pero al ver a Heracross y Pinsir juntos hizo que fuera imposible ignorar el dolor en su hecho-tal vez no todos pueden ser amados- pensó antes de volver a recordar el "suceso" y quedarse inmóvil-

-Mime mime!!-el ojiazul se sobresalto por la repentina interrupción pero al observar al Mr. Mime se tranquilizó-

-Lo siento no te vi llegar ¿Que pasa?- pregunto al pokemon el cual respondió con mímica indicándole que la cena ya estaba lista-

-Gou siguió al pokemon hacia el comedor donde estaba sentada Koharu mientras tomaba té yamper, sobble con Cinderace comiendo bayas-

-Creí que no vendrías-dijo la chica mientras tomaba un sorbo de té-

-Lo siento,estaba observando pokemon-tomó asiento mientras el pokemon psíquico servía un poco de curri y se lo entregaba-

-umm...realmente no me sorprende mucho-Dijo con una ligera risa-

Jaja-rio nerviosamente el moreno-K-koharu ¿no has visto a S-satoshi?-pregunto nervioso-

¿A que te refieres?-pregunto extrañada la peligranate-Supongo que ya termino de cenar y se fue - respondió siendo Está la conclusión más obvia a la que llego-

-La chica lo miro extrañada-Mmm el se fue a pueblo paleta por dos días,creí que te lo había dicho-

¿Que? No...El no me dijo nada-dijo con un pequeño dolor en su pecho-Que extraño el dijo que si lo había hecho- para luego mirar a su triste amigo-eh! Tal vez sólo lo olvido-exclamo tratando de hacer sentir mejor al moreno-

No,no lo creo-un silencio incómodo los envolvió pero en este se sentía la tristeza de uno de los individuos-Y-yo no lo se...él pudo...tal vez solo...Lo siento yo...agh!-trato de decir la chica mientras se golpeaba mentalmente por hacer sentir mal a su amigo-

-No te culpes, después de todo yo lo arruine-dijo mirando a la chica la cual se veía preocupada-Sabes....realmente no tengo hambre- se levantó de la mesa para retirarse-Gracias Mr.mime por la comida - agradeció mientras cargaba al pequeño sobble y salia de hay -

Gou...-miro a su amigo irse lleno de tristeza-Cinderace tu sabes que sucede?-pregunto al pokemon tipo fuego el cual se encogió de hombros-...Cuando ese tonto vuelva pueden darlo por muerto...-escupió con enojo mientras veía su reflejo en su té-

🍁〰🌼〰🍁

-Las lágrimas brotaban incontrolablemente de sus ojos mientras los iniciales de agua y fuego trataban de carmarlo inútilmente ya que el moreno quería encontrar a Arceus y parar todo y dejar de alejar a las personas que queria, recordo cuando todo era mejor cuando no pensaba que Satoshi lo odiaba y podía hablar despreucadente sin miedo a perderlo cuando todavía no sentía nada fuera de admiración o amistad-

-La noche siguió con sollozos llenos de dolor,las lágrimas saldas mojaban la almohada dejándolo tan débil y frágil mientras pensaba en lo que pudo haber pasado si no decía nada, ¿Pero de que servía? ya se confesó no puede borrar el pasado y si pudiera sus sentimientos lo harían volver a cometer ese error.....Lo mejor era desaparecer,huir para que las demás personas puedan ser felices y cumplir sus sueños sin ser un obstáculo para ellos...para el-

  
🍁〰🌼〰🍁

Koharu pov

-Después de la cena mi padre me llevo a casa aunque durante todo el camino pensé que le pasaba a Gou-

-Estuve analizando la situación y llegue a una pequeña conclusión..amor..Gou se había enamorado de Satoshi,ahora que lo pienso fue un poco obvio sólo es recordar la mayoría de interacciónes entre ellos-

-Pero observando la situación Gou hubiera llegado a un punto donde no hubiera podido ocultar sus sentimientos y se lo hubiera dicho...entonces el lo rechazo...Muy bien Satoshi te voy a matar-

-Me acosté junto a Yamper y aunque creo que tengo una parte del problema debe haber más pero ahora eso me sera suficiente para tratar de ayudar a Gou realmente,aunque puedo actuar fría junto a él y otras personas no quiero verlo triste lo conozco desde niño y esto lo puede afectar mucho sólo espero poder ayudarlo-


	2. 🍃~Help~🍃

-A new day had begun for people who left their homes to work, study or trainers to continue traveling the world-

-What seemed like a beautiful sunny day for the blue-eyed was just another day of guilt and sadness-

-He got up from the bed and went to the bathroom as best he could, when he arrived he could see his reflection in the mirror in which the most remarkable thing were his watery eyes that seemed made of glass-

-He fixed himself the best he could and performed his morning routine, wearing the best smile he could achieve, after all it is not easy to smile when your demons are eating you inside-

-Greeting to the teacher, Renji and Kikuna with Sobble and Cinderace and then heading to the dining room where their breakfast was ready with a serious and worried Koharu-

-Good morning! -He said feigning a cheerful and soft tone with a too fake smile -Good morning- said dryly his friend who was watching him intensely knowing that that smile was blatantly fake which only made him nervous-

-Gou have to talk, I want-

-Look at how g-big this yamper is! -He interrupted the girl with magenta hair-

-It's exactly the same -he said seriously -Oh really, he looks bigger -This time he was interrupted by the girl-

-Gou! -He raised his voice slightly as he gave a little knock to the table which scared Sobble-Stop acting like everything is fine ... Because it isn't, you're not, stop pretending you're just hurting me ... I want to help you but I need you to stop acting-

-...- The brunette didn't say anything and just looked at his plate while his mind was a total mess, a part wanted to tell him ... he wanted him to help him, he wanted to hide and cry while hugging Koharu like when they were younger and Gou was sad not to find Mew.  
While the other party wanted to tell him that he would take care of his own affairs, he wanted to run away and stop being a problem for others ... he wanted to stop ruining everything for others-

-Gou! -The girl shouted making Gou give a slight jump in his chair -... you have to go, you will be late for school ....- her body trembled threatening to collapse at any moment from the stress-

-Koharu checked her cell phone and indeed if she didn't leave she would be late so she picked up her backpack- we'll talk when she comes back - she said and then left the dining room and the laboratory-

-Gou just kept eating breakfast while tears fell on his food-

-When he finished he picked up the dishes and then carried Sobble and went to Sakuragi park ... he needed to clear his mind and calm down-

🌵〰🌻〰🌵

-Koharu came to school exhausted since she had to run all the way to not be late to add to that how tired she was that Gou will save everything for him ... in fact she found out about Tokyo after 3 years and it was the Last to find out ... he didn't even tell her himself she had to get information from Satoshi with food! (since apparently he had told him about it) ..... that explained their emotional downturn in 7-8 years, the same ones that made them separate, it was no longer eating sweets and playing to forget Mew that was more serious something that would affect Gou in the long run. She couldn't understand what happened on that trip that made her friend become so distant until she learned the truth-

-And then Satoshi arrived, it is as if the problems of her emotional life that she had struggled with for years had disappeared with the presence of that boy, Gou looked more and more happy and close with people which made her happy already that she believed they could go back to being the good friends they were before ... But what she believed would make everything better was separating them even more, Gou was more interested in pokemon and Satoshi always Satoshi ..... And at the same time time she started having her own problems with what she wanted for her future.  
So he simply left Gou in the care of Satoshi, she couldn't keep up with the brunet but knew that at least he had someone to take care of him ...

-She was thinking all day that she shouldn't have yelled at him that only made him even more afraid of telling her what was wrong, so she would have to apologize and try to talk about him trusting her and being able to help him that was the only thing that I wanted to see him happy again and reciting his speech with his typical "the future is in my hands" while his eyes shone with emotion-

-the girl let out a choked sigh when the classes ended, she gathered her things and as she left the room she thought about when she had become Gou's therapist, which made her let out a small laugh-

🌵〰🌻〰🌵

-After that disastrous breakfast Gou went to the park, sakuragui needed to think things over, to think what he was doing-

-But thinking it was impossible through her mind only that memory passed, it was more and more painful to remember it but still it did not stop Gou's mind was playing with her and that was horrible ... Everything lately was horrible her emotional and physical

With Koharu who had become quite dry before, she was now hanging by a fine thread that could easily break with any movement and she really didn't want to think about what would happen when Satoshi came back that would be torture-

-He sat under a tree, while he saw all his happy pokemon, he even thought that it would be better if it were a pokemon maybe this way everything will improve, unconsciously he imagined him being a Scorbuny which made him giggle the only real one later For so long, he rested his head on the bark of the tree and thus closed his eyes that naturally reflected the sea of Alola although now they seemed to reflect a devastating storm that did not seem to end-

🌵〰🌻〰🌵

-Koharu came from school and when she got to the dining room to have lunch she didn't see Gou, she supposed he was avoiding her or so she believed until the initial fire of her friend took her by force to the sakuragui park where she showed her a sleeping Gou-

-At first she thought about waking her up but she didn't know if she had slept well the night before, so she asked Cinderace to take her to her room and let her sleep-

-She had lunch and was still sleeping which did not bother her, I would only let her sleep a little more ... dinner arrived and she still did not wake up at first she thought about letting him sleep but I would not let him stay on an empty stomach so I have dinner faster than he could and asked Cinderace to wake him up while she was carrying dinner-

-mmm-growled the boy when he felt something touch him-Cinderace? -he asked when he saw the owner of those soft paws that touched his face, but he received no answer since the fire rabbit got up and left the room for some What minutes later between a loud yamper barking happily followed by Koharu with a plate of food and Cinderace with a cup of tea and a plate of cookies while Sobble slept on his head-

-Dinner in the room !! - she said happily as she placed the cookie and the tea on the desk and took the plate of food to Gou -Here, I won't let you starve - she said handing over the plate with a slight understanding smile-thanks - said the blue-eyed receiving the plate with surprise as he was expecting an angry Koharu not one who will bring him dinner and with a slight smile included -What did you do with Koharu? -he asked trying to hold back his laughter as he saw his friend's face pretending offense-hey !! .... well I kidnapped her and you will not see them again -he said making the brunette laugh and she also giggled-

-They talked about several things without worrying about the "topic" everything felt as if they were little carefree about love problems or problems with their future, they were only talking for a few minutes-

-Thank you -said the boy suddenly surprising the girl sitting next to him-huh? Why? - she asked confused - For not leaving me alone ... For continuing to be my friend even when I can be complicated - the girl was simply surprised - I sincerely believed that our friendship did not work every day we separated more and slowly it was falling apart ... ... sorry for being so stupid you just try to help me but I'm just running away trying to feel better but I only worry the people I care about and drag them into a dark abyss full of loneliness and sadness ...... sometimes I just think it would be better if I left - he was interrupted by arms surrounding him and his friend sobbing-hey I'm sorry I didn't want to make you sad - he said trying to calm her down - I'm not sad for my fool, I'm sad for you stop blaming you for everything no you are no bother to anyone you can be complicated sometimes but I could not be happier to have met you-his tears wet the boy's shirt remaining in a comfortable silence-

-Do you want to talk about it? -The film broke the silence -... I guess I need the help of the therapist Koharu ....- she said laughing although her chest ached from the mention of the "topic" -well, tell me-

🌵〰🌻〰🌵

-mmm-the girl with the two emerald eyes who was sitting next to her analyzed everything that her friend had told her while she was sad, holding her knees certain of her head trying to hide in it and with traces of tears on her face-

-T-that sounds bad enough to be honest-

-And it is-

-You tried to talk to him-

-No, I did not do it-

-Well you should-

-I don't think he wants to see me again-

-Koharu took him by the shoulders - Do not think that ... I have seen them so happy with each other and perhaps he does not reciprocate your feelings but you cannot let their friendship be ruined by that, with time your Wounds will heal and you will find someone, but if you don't talk to him, your friendship could fall apart ... I don't want to see you sad about that ... just talk to him and try to fix things, don't let things get worse, you'll only hurt yourself more - The blue-eyed hugged her so tightly that Koharu thought she would suffocate her-

-Then I just tell him how I feel-

-yes, try to be nice and clear-

... show yourself safe don't cry in the middle of the talk-

-I will try although I do not promise to avoid crying-

-One of these days you get dehydrated from crying-

-Koharu it's time to go !! - shouted Professor Sakuragi-

-Well, I have to go, so let go of me and you'll end up suffocating me-

-Sure, thanks .... I really don't know what I'd do without you ....-

"Believe me, I know," he said jokingly as he got out of bed and picked up Yamper.

-See you tomorrow -the brunette said goodbye-

-Yes, by the way eat the cookies I made them so they are delicious .... See you tomorrow- express leaving the room-

-Leaving the brunette with his pokemon-Surely they are -he said getting up from the bed and trying one-

🌵〰🌻〰🌵

Koharu was in her father's car on the way home while stroking a sleeping Yamper she thought

"Maybe I should never have tried to keep up with you ... maybe I should have created my own and danced with you"

The girl smiled knowing that although she could not be with her friend all the time, their friendship continued to be strong and flourished every day more, she could no longer take care of him like a baby since that baby had grown and she too, they would continue together only with a different rhythm but at the end of the day they would complement each other dancing on the track that is life-

**Author's Note:**

> It is the first time that I do it on some pokemon ship I hope you liked it ... that and I am not so professional in writing a fanfic so sorry if I made a mistake


End file.
